


The Perfect Contestant

by RotaRegion



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/F, Game Shows
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-08
Updated: 2018-11-10
Packaged: 2019-08-20 13:03:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,565
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16556282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RotaRegion/pseuds/RotaRegion
Summary: For decades, Moira had watched her favorite game show, Wheel of Fortune, hosted by the beautiful Ana Amari. When she gets the opportunity to go to an audition, she embraces it.





	1. The Tryouts

Moira O'Deorain worked at her much-hated job researching biotics, with her only joy in life being a game show. "Wheel of Fortune" started when she was 13 and disillusioned with life as a whole. But Wheel filled a special place that caused her to love life again. Maybe it was the gameplay, with healthy amounts of luck and skill mixed using a large wheel of prizes and penalties combined with a hangman-style system for solving puzzles. Maybe it was the tension of the show culminating in a high-value win.

No, it wasn't that. When Moira first watched the show, the first thing she noticed was the lovely Ana Amari. The host of the show, Ana had limpid dark eyes, tastefully done makeup, a dark braid peeking out from under a bright head wrapping, and a different outfit for each show, each one more beautiful than the last. She always spoke kindly to the contestants, even if Moira didn't think they deserve it. Ana also used her biotically-engineered rifle to help injured people in her spare time, the same rifle that she fired at the puzzle board to make it light up a letter. Just from seeing her on the show, Moira could tell that she really liked Ana.

Moira watched the show grow with her, as it went from giving out ceramic Dalmatians as prizes that had to be bought with prize money to giving out cash directly. She watched as the Bonus Round changed from asking for five consonants and a vowel to giving away R, S, T, L, N, E for free. She learned to predict the patterns of the show and what puzzles they may use until it got to the point where she could consistently solve at least one puzzle with no letters every show. Even as Ana married Sam and they had a daughter together, Moira still had the same feelings about her. When they divorced amicably after a decade, Moira felt sad that Ana no longer had someone, but a shameful sense of relief bubbled in her also.

And for the time she watched the show, Moira applied every year, putting more effort into her videos each year, with no success.

Finally, when Moira was 48, she got a message from the show. "You have been selected to go to a Wheel of Fortune audition!"

It was a start! They must have accepted her because of the giant working puzzle board made using hardlight technology ordered from Vishkar. The audition date was a week away, and Moira, even being proud of her claw-like nails, couldn't help but bite them before the date approached.

She arrived at the audition room, then had to fill out a form about herself. As other hopefuls flooded in, the screen in the room played clips of the best solves and worst missolves on the show. Moira found herself sitting between a woman with spiky black hair and an orange-themed outfit, and a woman with a hexadecimal-code printed shirt and a purple-dyed undercut. Then, a woman with golden hair decorations and a resemblance to Ana walked into the front of the room.

"Welcome to the Wheel of Fortune audition!"

Everyone in the room clapped, just like how contestants were supposed to clap on the show.

"My name is Fareeha, I will be your host for today. Now, we know that what makes a good Wheel of Fortune contestant is excitement."

Really? Moira always thought it was a good solve.

"I need all of you to give me your best Wheel of Fortune chant!"

"WHEEL! OF! FORTUNE!" the contestant hopefuls called out. Moira tried to make her chant the loudest of all, and even remembered to clap just after.

"Great! Now, here is how things are done in this audition. I'll call one of you at random. You will have the same options as on the show, spin, buy a vowel, or solve. If you choose to spin, I will spin this little wheel here. If you call a wrong letter, go bankrupt, or lose your turn, someone else will be called. Also, make sure your letter calls are just the letter. No unnecessary pleases, 'can I have a...', none of that. We will move on when everyone has had two turns."

The first puzzle was under the category of What Are You Doing? and the first person called on asked for a T. Moira couldn't believe it. When the category is What Are You Doing, you always call N first, because there will be an ING ending! But she made sure to clap for every contestant's spin and correct letter, because it was good practice for the show.

Finally, Fareeha called for "Moira!" The puzzle was a TV Title, and the last contestant had called a bad S. Moira knew it with no letters, but that wasn't good strategy, so she "spun" for the only consonant that appeared more than once on the board. "F!"

"Two F's!" When they showed up, Moira knew exactly what the puzzle was. '

"Wheel of Fortune!" 

"You're right!" Fareeha walked up to Moira, handing her an oversized black shirt with orange letters that said SPIN THIS. She put it on over her plain black shirt. 

The puzzle came to Moira again, but she didn't know it, and she called a bad T. The puzzle was Very Busy Schedule.

Finally, everyone had been called on twice, and Fareeha passed out written tests. They each had sixteen puzzles with certain letters showing on them, and the test was timed for 10 minutes. When the test ended, Moira thought she got 15/16, because there was one puzzle that she couldn't solve. As the tests were graded, Moira realized that the Rhyme Time puzzle she thought was Need and Greed was actually Meet and Greet. Maybe 14/16 was enough to be a Wheel contestants.

After grading the test, Fareeha had something else to say. "Now, it's time to see who can move on to the second part of the audition. This does not determine who will be a contestant later. If I call your name, stay here. If you do not hear it, you are free to leave. Either way, if you are accepted, you will get a message within two weeks of the audition." Then she started calling names.

To her surprise, Moira actually heard her name! Well, she did solve. 

The second part of the audition chose three contestants to play one puzzle like on the show. Moira was assigned to the middle position between the two women she was seated between, who she found out were named Lena and Olivia.

Lena got the first turn to play the puzzle. She spun for the T, and there were three in the puzzle. Then, she bought the E, finding two. After another spin, Lena called a bad R.

Moira looked at the puzzle.

_ _ _ _ _ / _ _ _ _  
_ _ T _ / _ _ T _ _ _ _ _  
_ _ _ E / _ E _ T

That four-letter word with the T was probably "with". Then, Moira remembered something. It was an episode where Ana had a present stuck to her dress. The puzzle was Comfy Sofa With Matching Love Seat. "I'll spin."

Fareeha spun the wheel. "700!" she shouted.

"C!"

"Two C's!" 

As the C's showed up, it was confirmed Moira was right about the puzzle. "Comfy Sofa With Matching Love Seat!" she solved.

"Correct!" She received a signed picture of Ana.

When everyone left had played, Moira left. Now, what she had to do was wait for the message.


	2. Winner

Moira checked the messages on her computer every day just for that one from Wheel of Fortune. A week after the audition, she found a message with the subject line "Wheel of Fortune". 

It said, "Congratulations! You have been accepted to be on Wheel of Fortune! Your theme week will be Lemur Week. We will send you a follow-up message in an 18-month period from the date this message was received with information about your taping date. It will be two weeks after you receive it."

The usually serious Moira leaped up in excitement. She let out a sound resembling a small squeaky toy before crying out, "I can't wait for Wheel of Fortune, have to get on Wheel of Fortune, I need the Wheel now!" But Lemur Week seemed weird to her.

Moira watched the show even in reruns, then when it finally got out of its rerun phase for Season 36, Ana announced a new feature. "We will now have returning champions!"

Returning champions! That would be interesting. It would be like Jeopardy!, which Moira never paid attention to, because she never liked the attitude of its host Reinhardt Wilhelm, but was always more popular because it had the "returning champion" feature. For three months, Moira followed the show, keeping up with the puzzles. She had enough Wheel of Fortune knowledge to know that the same puzzle was never used twice in a season, so at least she could rule some out.

Then, she received another message from the show. "Your taping date is in two weeks!" And indeed it was.

The day before the taping date, Moira packed up a black suit with a yellow and purple striped tie for her Wheel outfit and stayed in a hotel near the taping area. After watching Wheel of Fortune, she drifted off, dreaming of how she would do on the show.

Moira wasted no time in getting to the studio the next day. She wanted to arrive early to impress the contestant coordinators. "Welcome to Wheel of Fortune," one said. He was extremely short with a large, straw-colored beard. "When the other contestants arrive, I will guide you through your Wheel of Fortune experience."

Later, two other contestants walked in. One was a musclebound woman with short pink hair, the other a woman with long dark hair and bright blue earrings. "This is our returning champion, Aleksandra," said the man, pointing to the muscular woman. Other contestants flooded in until it was time to start playing.

"We'll have two contestants competing against Aleksandra for the first episode." He pointed to two people in the crowd, not including Moira. "You can watch from the screen in the green room."

Moira watched so that she could keep an eye on what puzzles had already been used. When the second episode came to taping, Aleksandra was still champion and Moira did not play that episode either. On the third episode taped... Moira was picked! She got shuffled off to the makeup department, where makeup coordinators airbrushed her to look video feed-ready. When they finished, Moira tried to walk out, but first, Ana greeted her. "Good luck," she said. 

Moira sweated down her back. Ana Amari was really talking to her! But she had to focus on the game show for now.

Taping had started, and Moira was in the middle, between the returning champion and the dark-haired woman she had noticed earlier. Moira was disappointed she didn't get the spot next to Ana, but that was reserved for returning champions, and what if she became one?

"Welcome, everyone, it's time for our first Toss-Up, and the category is On The Map," said Ana, wearing a light pink scarf and a dress done in many pink shades and bound with a golden sash. Toss-Ups were puzzles where letters filled in randomly and you had to buzz in to try to solve. But Moira knew it just from seeing the puzzle was one ten-letter word. She hit her buzzer immediately. "Moira," called Ana.

"Madagascar!" 

"You're right! So tell us a little about yourself, Moira O'Deorain."

"Got it right on the first try. So, I'm a geneticist from Dublin, Ireland, and my work ends up helping others just like you do with your biorifle."

"And you've watched the show since...?"

"Since its very first episode aired, and ever since then, I have been in love with you..."

"Well, I bet you haven't missed one since."

The other challenger's name was Satya, and she was a hardlight developer from India. Aleksandra was a military technician from Russia who had weightlifting as a favorite activity. 

The next Toss-Up was a TV Title. Moira solved it after two letters, and it was The Price is Right, a game show that never interested her.

"You get to start the first round. The category tonight is Before & After."

The puzzle looked like this:

_ _ _   
_ _ _ _ _   
_ _ _ / _ _ _ _ _ _   
_ _ / _ _ _ _

Moira didn't know it yet, so she spun, landing herself in the $2,500 space. "T!" she called.

_ _ T   
_ _ _ T _   
_ T _ / _ _ _ _ _ T   
_ _ / _ _ _ _ 

"Four T's!" 

Those T's represented $10,000. 

"I'd like to buy an E."

_ E T   
_ _ _ T _  
_ T _ / _ E _ _ _ T  
_ _ / _ _ _ _

"I'll spin." She landed on $700. "S!"

_ E T  
_ _ _ T _   
_ T S / _ E _ _ _ T  
_ _ / _ _ _ _

"I'd like to buy an I."

_ E T  
_ _ _ T _  
I T S / _ E I _ _ T  
I _ / _ _ _ _ 

Moira looked at the puzzle. The second half of the phrase could be "Worth its weight in gold", but what about the first half? She soon decided it had to be "Net worth". Since she had a lot of money anyway, Moira said, "I'd like to solve: Net Worth Its Weight In Gold!"

"Well done!" 

After the break, Ana assigned the contestants another puzzle. This time, Satya would spin first. She called a T.

"Two T's!"

_ _ _ _ _ _   
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _  
T _ _ _ _ _ _ / T _ _   
_ _ _ _ _ _ 

She bought an E, which went through for three E's, and then spun for an H, picking up three. Satya finally bought a bad A, though.

Aleksandra started off her turn with a spin for the N's, and got three. She followed it up with two R's. But then, she hit a Bankrupt.

When Moira saw the puzzle on her turn, it looked like:

_ E _ _ R _   
_ _ _ N _ _ N _   
T H R _ _ _ H / T H E  
_ _ N _ _ E

She decided to spin for the G's, since the -ING ending was so common, and picked up four on a $600. Next came an I buy.

_ E _ _ R _   
_ _ I N G I N G  
T H R _ _ G H / T H E   
_ _ N G _ E

Then, Moira remembered the theme of the week. The top word could be Lemurs. "I'd like to solve," she said. "Lemurs swinging through the jungle!"

"Right again!" The other contestants clapped, but they looked a little disappointed about it.

Moira won the next round, and it was a Prize Puzzle, which simply padded her lead as it was a trip to Ireland. She didn't even try to solve the third Toss-Up; she wanted to let one of those other contestants have a chance. $3,000 were gone, but did she really need that now?

"It seems time is running out, so I'm going to give the wheel a Final Spin," said Ana. "Every consonant will be worth..." The wheel stopped on $5,000. "I guess that's their value! And the category is Phrase."

In the Final Spin, each contestant only got one letter per turn. Aleksandra had the first turn, since she solved the Toss-Up. She called a T, and two showed up. Moira got three N's, and Satya did not get the R she asked for.

_ _ _ _ N _ / _ N  
T _ _ / _ _ _ _ N T

The obvious H was the only thing Aleksandra could think of, and the obvious one was the only one she got. Moira remembered R, S, T, L, N, E... so she picked an S. It wasn't there. Satya had no luck with her guess of C, and Aleksandra's next guess of L didn't let her solve. The puzzle then showed:

L _ _ _ N _ / _ N  
T H _ / _ _ _ _ N T

"M!" Moira called boldly.

"Two M's!" Ana fired at two tiles.

L _ _ _ N _ / _ N  
T H _ / M _ M _ N T

"Living in the moment!" shouted Moira. 

"You're right! You're our big winner, which means you'll be going on to our next show, but first you have to play the Bonus Round. Do you want Event, Things, or What Are You Doing?" asked Ana.

"Event will be fine."

After the break, Ana led Moira over to the smaller wheel. "You won a lot tonight, and even had the first no-letter solve in the show's history. That's indeed impressive. Now, spin the little wheel."

Moira spun it, and Ana grabbed her clawed hand, walking her to the area in front of the puzzleboard.

"R, S, T, L, N, E." Ana lit up those letters.

_ _ _ E R   
_ _ T _ _ E

Immediately, something came to Moira's mind. Her letters called were, "P, W, G, O."

"Okay, let's see how this turns out... audience, don't say anything!" She shot her rifle into way too many letters.

P O W E R  
O _ T _ G E

"Now you just have to... read what's up there. Good luck."

"Power outage!" screamed Moira happily.

"Let's see what you've won!" Ana pulled an envelope out of the bonus wheel. "Want some cash?" It was $36,000, the minimum, but at least she won.

In the heat of the moment, Moira wrapped her arms around Ana and nuzzled her neck. Ana laughed. "I guess you did like me! And that's great because you're coming back for the next show!"


	3. The Last Day

For 73 more episodes of the show, Moira just kept on winning. Even with the wheel adding the element of chance, she was just that good.

Every time Moira won 10 games in a row, Ana would congratulate her. They gradually ran out of things to talk about, and it progressed into just discussing how Wheel of Fortune itself is played, and later even how each of them looked.

On day 50, Ana gave Moira her rifle so that she could shoot the letters for a day. She didn't get the puzzle template on a cue card, though; Ana kept it and called the letter frequencies. 

On day 56, Moira somehow won the million-dollar prize, despite it taking extreme luck to win. This made her have the highest game show total winnings in history. 

Finally, on day 74, Moira was playing against contestants named Jamison and Mei. During the first three rounds of the game, Moira won $16,009, including a trip, and Mei had $12,131, including the "1/2 Car" prize, where she guessed a correct letter on two specific wedges to pick up two halves of a car that made her win a car by solving the puzzle.

When it was time for Ana to give the wheel a final spin, she landed on $5,000. The puzzle looked like this, under the category "What Are You Wearing?"

_ _ _ _ _ _   
_ _ _ _ _ _

"T!" said Moira.

_ _ _ _ _ _   
_ _ _ _ _ T

"Golden jacket?" That wasn't it.

Jamison called a bad S, and Mei called R.

_ _ _ _ _ R  
_ _ _ _ _ T

"Bomber jacket!" called Mei.

"You're right!" The $5,000 from that one R was enough to push her over the top.

Moira slumped into the audience and watched Mei play her Bonus Round. Why did she have to win it? Moira could have solved "a group of hedgehogs" with just RSTLNE. 

Then, Ana walked over to the section of the audience where Moira was sitting. "I'd like to speak with you in my dressing room," she said. Moira followed her there.

"You'll probably be the longest-running Wheel of Fortune contestant of all time for years to come. Even if I had only seen your first episode, I would have known you had great talent for the game. You just lost because the wheel got you in the second round and it helped Mei out a lot. I will say in all my years of hosting the show, there was never a contestant who knew the game as well as you did. Besides, now that you're no longer an official Wheel of Fortune contestant, there's no more conflict of interest."

"You mean...?"

"I do. What about we start dating each other?"

"That would be a great idea. The original host of Family Feud married a contestant, didn't he?"

Ana pulled Moira into a kiss. After pulling away, she said, "How about we go on one of the trips you won from me?"

"I recommend the Ireland trip."


End file.
